Unacyclist

I did many things as hobby in my lifetime, yet unicycling is something to last. Most urban environments offer sufficiently levelled surfaces, it's a bit faster than walking, much more fun though, and it reminds me of my work as Alexander Technique teacher in a mindful and non-intellectual way.

I also love the reaction of people I encounter along my cruises. Today's ride on a sunny autumn day was action-packed like never before, with some big surprises along the way. At the moment, quite a lot of the bike paths I usually take are blocked off, finding a safe route into the CBD can be quite challenging.

Off peak hours, Lygon Street doesn't scare me much, as long as the cars stay on their lanes the parked cars offer enough space for a slow moving unicycle. Bikes overtake me a lot, and while I soaked in the sunny afternoon, a MAMIL (middle-aged men in lycra) overtook me on his racing bike. He swerved over the tram tracks, and threaded his front wheel into the tracks on the way back. Ouch.

In Dr ABC fashion, while some helper guarded the cyclists from traffic, I moved his bike out of the way, before helping the guy to the side of the road. Assuring he was fine, besides some bruises, I cycled on. At the next set of traffic lights, someone had ripped the metal casing for the button open, when I started my index finger hooked into the sharp end and cut it.

Slightly bigger than a needle prick, the wound bled a bit. When I found something to wrap around the finger, I swerved a bit to the 'wrong side' of the bike track, which was greeted by another MAMIL with an 'Fuckwit!' outcry.

At the end of this section of the bike path, a school class was gathered next to it, spotting me early and spreading excitement. "You're awesome! I saw you yesterday! A unicycle!" And when I finally passed next to them, a round of applause accompanied me. After bowing and thanking it was hard to wipe the smile off my face.

The cruise along Royal Parade and the uni campus went smoothly, yet I kept my guard up for a potential encounter with Melbourne Bike Patrol. The center piece of the most liveable city of the world is currently a nasty construction site, with most of the pavement fenced off for a tight pedestrian squeeze. So unlike in the good old days (last December), when there was hardly any car traffic from the State Library down to Flinders Street Station, I had push along the pavement, and then switching to the road whenever possible.

Finally, on the block of Melbourne City Hall, I spotted two blue-shirted bike patrollers on the other side of the road. I continued my ride, swerved onto the pavement to walk over the pedestrian crossing, when I heard my name. "L, can we talk to you for a moment?"

It was the same constable that gave me last fine, however, his approach was this time much friendlier. He told me that a letter is on the way to me, revoking the fine. It become obvious that they had researched the current road code, and wanted to stop any further processing. More importantly, it seemed as if now the entire bike patrol knew about the lack of compulsory helmets for unicycle. At the next block of Swanston Street, one patroller I hadn't seen before, addressed me by name to spread the good news.

I still don't know how happy I can be about the change of events. Even the short talks I had indicated how much the police knows now about me, and at least the Unacycling incidents. Although I get myself prepared to stand my case in court, I don't insist on turning this into a hilarious spectacle.