So i while appreciate finding the good within the bad, "Don't be negative!" seems like the war cry of those playing the old-fashioned game of domination while preaching cooperation. I heard it a lot while pointing out things that didn't actually work out.
When I studied psychology, I came across an interesting finding. Those diagnosed to be "depressed", often showed a much more realistic attitude to their environment, instead of a positive bias. Now, that might indicate that I'm probably a bit depressed, however, I still think it's much better in a working environment to assess situations realistically than "positively biased".
Luckily, I changed the place of work. I remember one guy I my last working environment inundating with me the mantra "Don't be negative!" while flicking his cigarette butt into the front yard patch which I converted from a public dumping ground into a patch full of usable plants. Hold on a second, Ollie, do you really think it's appropriate to give me a bad time while you're not caring a bit about your immediate environment?
Get me right (doesn't that much better than the double negative: Don't get me wrong?), I like working out things okay. I don't play the blame game, which means if what has to be done can be done I'm in a happy space. Humans seem to be thriving when they manage to solve problems, yet it seems like a minority of people seems only happy when they can create problems for others. Like claiming "Don't be negative!", when someone points out that sailing to another island needs boat, and the one around is leaking.
My memory of past lives certainly sucks. Again, I'm realistic here, not delusional in the way to claim that when I've been pharaoh everyone else had a good life, how the fuck did it all go to shit? Quite obviously, if the Egyptians created an ideal society for all, it hasn't survived. Nevertheless, the pyramids help us to remember that knowledge and craftmanship were probably more advanced than today. If our contemporary society can't build something that has been build thousands of years ago, it's quite obvious that we aren't the most advanced society of this planet.
As mentioned before, pointing out that things don't work out doesn't mean being a "negative nanny". If you want to go on a road trip, and your car doe clue what they are has highest priority. Preventing anyone from fixing the most urgent problem, because it's "negative" to even mention that the car doesn't work, demonstrates a highly delusional mind set.
However, it seems so much easier to make someone feel bad about pointing out the obvious than solving an actual problem. The gratification derived from some other person's emotional distress might not trump the one derived from solving a problem, however, it offers immediate happiness, the most valuable currency in our deeply dysfunctional times. In my experience, no matter how eager you try to ignore a challenge, it doesn't make it go away. Feel free to call me a "negative nanny " for pointing out the obvious.
It seems futile to point out that "Don't be negative" uses a double negative to bring its message home. If someone deliberately uses this phrase, it's to make them feel better on your expense in a social context. It creates a no-win situation for you, and you're probably better off to avoid those people than trying to make the situation work. Most likely, anything you mention in your defence will be construed against you.
Let's end this on a positive note. If you happen to encounter people who label you as "negative", they most likely have no fucking clue what they are talking about. They need support which they won't accept from you, and often haven't even realised how dearly they need it. Don't let their delusional self confidence bring you down - that's what their "Don't be negative" rant is all about.
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